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Archaeology: Flatworms Decimate Aristophanes Hermaphrodite Theory

Among the most influential and enduring of Greek axioms, postulates, and theorems are Pythagoras magic triangle and Aristophanes hermaphrodite concept. According to Aristophanes, there were originally three sexes – male, female and a combination of male and female – the hermaphrodite. Aristophanes postulated that the Greek gods, threatened by the hermaphrodites, split them apart. The result was that the poor split hermaphrodites spent their entire life looking for their mate. While this explanation of the origin of the sexes has been abandoned by many in the scientific community, a few pockets of believers have remained. They maintain an almost 3000 year tradition of hermaphrodite study. Dr. Samuel Wong, among the most outspoken advocates for hermaphroditism heads up the Hermaphrodite Studies Department at Southeastern Virginia State University. But Even the otherwise confident Dr. Wong is shaken up by a stunning new discovery, ironically from one of his own former protegees, Doctor Professor Nico Michiels, of the University of Tuebingen in Germany. In the July Issue of the Journal Animal Behavior Michiels announced his astonishing discovery that hermaphroditic flatworm Pseudobiceros bedfordi actually do not get along. Pseudobiceros have “pale sideways penises” that allow them to both shoot sperm and give birth to children, a perfect hermaphroditic system in the Aristophanian sense. And yet the Psuedobiceros are according to Michiels among the most unhappy of flatworms, dueling with each other by swinging their pale penises in a menacing way whenever they encounter one another. This aggressive and anti-social behavior is “fully supported by the literature,” admits Dr. Wong, who stands to lose funding if the community accepts Michiels tentative rebuttal of the origin of the sexes. “We havent yet found a problem with Nicos research,” he admits. Not yet. But we are looking. But three thousand years of research is a long time. Lets hope we find something,” said Wong.