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Finance: Jaspers Strain Influences August Consumer Spending

The recent Jaspers outbreaks continue to affect the personal income and consumption index, todays report from the Commerce Department shows. Amongst the largest influences affecting the numbers was the mysterious drop in oil consumption from major oil producing corporations. “We dont know where people are getting their gas from, but its not on our charts,” Jim Miggleton of the Commission for Consumer Tracking said. “The numbers act as if each individual somehow discovered an oil well in their backyard.” The August numbers showed consumer spending at its lowest in over 5 years. In addition, there were contradictory signs of consumer confidence. The University of Michigans index of consumer sentiment rose to 85.4 in September, indicating that while consumers were buying less, they were happier about it, a bad sign for big box stores like Target and Walmart. However, Oil remained one of the largest concerns of the Commission for Consumer Tracking. “Theres some kind of fungoid growth relationship between the Jaspers influence and consumer oil consumption, and we arent sure what it is yet. But we have several ongoing investigations attempting to find out.”, Miggleton commented.